Infidelity is a challenging experience that many couples face and it’s much more common than you might think.
Infidelity can rock a relationship to its core, oftentimes shattering its original foundation. If you’ve done any unofficial research on infidelity to help you navigate this situation, you may have heard of Belgian-American Psychologist Esther Perel. Esther specializes in helping couples navigate infidelity and she often says once infidelity occurs, the old relationship dies, and a new one has to begin.
Whether you are the betrayed partner or the one who strayed, you are likely experiencing the weight of the betrayal and confusion about where to go next. I’m here to let you know that help is available. Couples therapy for infidelity can offer a path forward toward healing and growth amidst this pain.
Maybe you’ve already had hundreds of conversations regarding the affair, from the details of who, what, when, and where, to the larger looming question of “how do we recover from this?”. Or maybe you and your partner haven’t had much conversation about it, for fear of what comes next. Regardless of where you land, taking the next step to start or continue a conversation in therapy can help. Therapy can guide you in gaining a better understanding of yourselves individually, your relationship, and your future.
Now, before we lay out exactly how infidelity counseling can be a helpful resource, I want to discuss the importance of having a judgment-free space.
Infidelity is a deeply painful experience full of shame and guilt. The time a couple spends reflecting and processing can be overwhelming for each partner. The last thing you need to feel throughout infidelity counseling is criticism or judgment. Connecting with a therapist that can help both of you settle into being vulnerable is essential for the healing process.
Here Is a Glimpse of what New Jersey Counseling for Infidelity Can Do For You
Gain an understanding of the Root Cause
Infidelity is often a symptom of underlying complications or issues you are facing within the relationship, whether spoken or unspoken. In infidelity counseling, you, your partner, and your therapist will explore the factors that contributed to the breach of trust. Oftentimes this means examining your communication styles, unmet needs, built-up resentments, and so much more. Through understanding these root causes, we gain insight and utilize tools to repair the rupture, rebuild trust, and navigate any future conflicts.
Process Your Emotions
From the moment of disclosure or discovery till now, there is a chance you have experienced a range of emotions such as anger, grief, depression, anxiety, and shame. These feelings of betrayal may be unlike anything you have ever experienced, leaving you feeling confused and concerned about how to move forward. Counseling can help to validate your emotional experience. Furthermore, you can develop healthy coping strategies for navigating the varied emotions you might have through the process.
Rebuild Trust
Once we take the time to process our feelings and gain a better understanding of the root cause, another key step is to rebuild trust. When faced with the impact of an affair couples tend to implement new rules and boundaries in an effort to rebuild trust. However, giving your partner even an ounce of trust can be very scary for many betrayed partners. Betrayed partners can feel that withholding trust is the safest option because if trust is given, their partner may mistake this for forgiveness, even if the partner who strayed is following the requested boundaries. In counseling, we aim to take small steps to help rebuild that trust. We can work towards repairing the breach by thoroughly defining betrayal, examining boundaries, and creating moments of accountability. The rebuilding of trust takes time, but your therapist can offer a roadmap for the journey.
Rediscover Your Self-Worth
Infidelity can shatter both partner’s sense of self-worth. Many couples never fully believe that something like this could happen to them. However, when it does, clients immediately correlate the betrayal with their self-worth. Infidelity impacts millions of people, and the cause isn’t always related to your age, your beauty, or your confidence. A therapist can help you challenge your negative beliefs, cultivate self-compassion, and rebuild self-esteem.
NJ Infidelity Recovery and Healing
Healing from infidelity is not about forgetting or minimizing the past, but rather about learning, growing, and moving forward with all you have learned. A therapist can help you make hard decisions regarding the next step in your relationship. Together you, your partner, and your therapist can set realistic goals and develop healthy strategies for maintaining a healthy and fulfilling partnership.
Healing from infidelity is a journey that takes time, effort, and teamwork. Wherever you are in your journey, therapy can be a useful tool in providing a safe space for you to learn, grow, and change. Whether you are grappling with the aftermath of infidelity as a betrayed partner or straying partner, therapy can help you navigate this challenging time so that you come out stronger on the other side.
Start Infidelity Counseling in Branchburg, NJ, Sommerville, NJ, and Across New Jersey
Research shows that couples who are ready to make positive changes often thrive in therapy. If you’re looking to create a happier, healthier relationship and life, it’s absolutely possible. You can learn the tools you need to nurture a strong, secure, and fulfilling partnership.
If you’re seeking relationship guidance, feel free to call us at 908-224-7727 or fill out the contact form for a free 20-minute consultation. We’d love to discuss how couples counseling can help you reach your goals. Our offices are conveniently located in Scotch Plains and Branchburg, NJ, and we offer online therapy across the state of New Jersey. You can start your therapy journey with Brave Minds Psychological Services by following these simple steps:
- Contact us for a free phone consultation.
- Learn more about our team of caring therapists
- Start recovering from the effects of infidelity
Other Services Offered with Brave Minds Psychological Services
Infidelity counseling isn’t the only service offered by Brave Minds Psychological Services. Our team helps children, teens, and families overcome severe anxiety, stress, and painful experiences. We specialize in developing brave-minded youth who can move forward despite fears and significant challenges. Mental health services for children include child counseling, anxiety treatment for children, and child sexual abuse therapy. Additionally, we have therapists who specialize in offering therapy for teens, including counseling for teens with anxiety and social phobia treatment for teens.
Additionally, we offer a wide range of mental health services for adults including anxiety treatment, couples therapy/marriage counseling, counseling for postpartum depression, OCD treatment, bereavement counseling, and food allergy therapy. We also have specialized trauma therapy and PTSD treatment. This includes counseling for birth trauma, pregnancy loss and miscarriage, equestrian trauma, and sexual assault counseling for adults.